Housewife FAIL

I like to cook, bake, and clean...and think I am alright at all of the above. Sometimes I am just off though. I have been clumsy the past few days and tonight is the epitome of doing a bad job at housekeeping stuff.

Saturday night I broke a wine glass at CF's. My excuse was that I had stopped drinking at 11 and we left his friend's party at 3:30...A.M. and it was 4:00 A.M. and I wanted a drink of water but the Britta was empty and there was stuff in the sink. When I dropped the sink sprayer I was going to use to fill the Britta it hit the wine glass. CF was drunk, rolled his eyes, turned around to go to bed, and when I brought it up the next day did not realize (or did not remember) that I had broken the glass. Of course these are (inexpensive) wine glasses he has had for 10 years and the week before the one I was using had a crack. Anyhoo, to make it up to him, I ordered some Green Bay Packers wine glasses from Tar-jay.

That is just an example of my clumsiniess. Back to my evening. Last week I had the urge to make Christmas cookies - I am 30 (and do not really know why that matters), have the time, and am settled in here and happy. I do not have any of my mother's recipes (and have since requested them from her), so somehow I got it in my head to make meringue cookies. I mean, how hard can beating some egg whites and baking them be? I know how to beat eggs and turn my oven on. Some recipes are picky about using fine sugar or heating the oven to 250, putting the meringues in, turning the oven off and letting them cook overnight. My trusty Good Housekeeping (ironic title given the evening) has a quick and easy recipe calling for regular old sugar and a short 20 minutes at 300 degrees. I had a few flavors in mind - regular with chocolate chips, peppermint, peppermint-chocolate, and mocha.

My first batch of chocolate chip was great! Eggs beat to a stiff peak quickly, only baked them an extra five minutes, and they were quite tasty.

On to the peppermint. In theory and according to the recipe, it is as easy as switching out the vanilla extract for peppermint extract. Apparently, in my case, this equals a big liquidy beaten egg slop...three times. I have decided to blame it on the old peppermint extract I used. Seriously, it was from my grandmother's kitchen and she passed away 8 years ago and certainly did not cook for the last couple of years she was alive. So I wonder if the alcohol in the extract has absorbed water from the air and just doesn't do what it's supposed to? But I am stubborn and tried a few times. I could have switched to folding in some candy cane, but I used the candy cane over the weekend for some peppermint brownies. (As an aside, going back to look at this post, I had forgotten I got the idea for crushed candy cane on brownies from Spark - THANKS! I do this ALLLLLLL the time.)

Then I decided to let go of the peppermint and move on to mocha. Only the instant espresso I bought was the kind that has the powdered milk in it too, which I obviously did not realize when I bought it. So skip the mocha flavor.

I ended up doing chocolate-chocolate. You can add cocoa powder with the sugar after the eggs are initially beaten to a soft peak. The first time I added the cocoa powder, the cocoa puffed up everywhere leaving a layer of cocoa powder on the shelf and stove top that was great fun to clean up. The eggs were still beautifully peaked though, and I figured I would give the peppermint-chocolate a shot. BIG MISTAKE. I cleaned the beaten egg liquidy slop for the fourth time and stuck with the cocoa powder and sugar on the re-do.

All in all I used about 10 eggs for about 4 eggs worth of meringue cookies. This is what I got.

In addition to this fiasco, I needed to do a load of laundry before heading to my parents' for Christmas. The washer was full. There were a few sweaters in there, so I figured when I took those out, the dryer would dry everything else just fine. I knew I was taking a chance with two sweatshirts and two pairs of jeans in the mix though. I was right. Everything came out a little damp. So it is drying in my apartment because putting slightly damp clothes through another dry cycle is a waste of quarters and my apartment could use the added humidity anyway.

I feel like I had other housewife fails...Well, I put the cookies to cool on the table and of course it left crumbs all over the table cloth (duh). Maybe that is it, it just feels so tragic given it is (in theory) out of character. Time for bed. :-)