When one door closes another opens

Out on the porch the fly strip is
Waving like a flag in the wind
You know I really don't look forward
To seeing you again
You look like a photograph of yourself
Taken from far far away
And I won't know what to do
And I won't know what to say
Except fuck you

~Ani DiFranco

So tonight I saw the ex of long ago to whom I sent a text about a month ago. He emailed me less than a week ago saying he would be in town today and his friend was also here for a conference. So he wanted to take us out to dinner. And could he stay at my place. Two bottles of wine and wonderful dinner later, he decided to stay at the hotel with his friend.

After being so insistent about staying here (and my insistence that he tell his wife where he was staying...), it was strange. I would like to believe that after dinner (which involved me sending a few texts to Romeo), reference to the World Series winning game he let me watch alone in 2004 (which apparently he still feels super guilty about even though I was laughing about it), and his friend suggesting a couple of times that he stay at the hotel made him *finally* realize he needs to let us go? A slightly longish hug good-bye and his melancholy face suggested that may be the case.

A pretty big part of me wants to know why he changed his mind about staying at my place.

The other pretty big part just keeps thinking about Romeo and having this work out with him. Seriously. If there is any relationship I need to move on from still, it would be with CF, but this experience tonight with the ex-ex(-ex, if you count Bill now!) made me feel pretty strongly that even though I don't know Romeo that well (but I do know his last name now!!), I have this feeling that even if we don't agree on something I think we could talk about it and come to some agreement, or that our middle-children Aries personalities are enough alike and understanding of each other that strong opinions would not cause actual arguments. There is just something. And I just keep fending off thoughts that somehow I have invested too much hope in it all.