Boys are dumb

*Disclaimer: The below was written after I finished the final glass of pre-bed wine.*

K. So, two posts in one day. (You get to read them in the morning after I wrote them.) What a treat with my online absence and all, right? You all just wait until I set up internet, start reading everything you have written in the past month and comment on it all. I owe you…

So, the boy from my friends’ wedding? Did not work out. I think there must be something wrong with him (obviously), because, even though he “had fun hanging out, [he] did not want to pursue anything further.” Ummm…okay. I will blame his younger and stupid age, as well as the loss of momentum when I went on my trip in August. KHC’s boyfriend, the Captain, had named this stupid groomsman Captain #2 (not because their real-life names are the Captain, but rather their real-life names are real names, like Jack, for example, and the Captain came up with the numbering system, so he gets to be #1.) Now I refer to the stupid groomsman/Captain #2 as #2, like poop.

Poop prevented me from taking advantage of certain things when I traveled in August, like a Dude at the course in MT, for example. And by Poop, I mean the stupid groomsman/Captain #2/# 2/Poop; not like I had an intestinal problem while I was traveling. Certain things = fellow grad student, who I have apparently nicknamed Dude, participating in the course with whom I am currently obsessed because I decided it is not good to be obsessed with a friend with whom I have been obsessed all month (got it?). He, the Dude, and I flirt INCESSANTLY on Facebook chat now. Seriously. I need to give the dude my phone number so we can flirt on the phone. My friend who also went to MT mentioned that this Dude and I should have, you know…yeah…And she is right. Now I am stuck with someone with whom I can only flirt incessantly while in different time zones and invite to visit for the next beerfest here (which he then LOOKED UP, I might add), because what other excuse could I come up with to suggest he visit??? It is a plane flight away, people, and we are in grad school. And he is an international student (I do not know why that is important, but I am a few glasses of wine into the night). And we are not in the same city. Did I mention we are not in the same city? Because am I doing this to torture myself because it is easy to say, “Oh, it did not work out because we are in different cities,” or am I willing to live in a land-locked state (well, they have a ginormous lake at least) to date someone?? And why am I even thinking about dating the Dude when we did not even, you know…, in MT and we merely flirt incessantly ONLINE. Ummm…I just like him because he is a smart farmer. Seriously. How sexy is a really smart farmer with an accent???

*Second Disclaimer* I feel silly for posting this now that it is the morning after I wrote it, but I will anyway. If I had internet at home, I totally would have posted it last night, what with the wine and all.*