I do not think there is anything special about feeling like you can't cut it. Apparently I allude to the whole Imposter Syndrome thing about once a year too. I am having to remind myself of this as I have done less prep for my interview than I thought I would. I gave a practice talk at lab meeting today. The first thing my boss said was that my slides were great. She mentioned it a couple of times. I have to stop psyching myself out! I came home and tried on outfits to bring, and they look fine. Despite my paper not yet being submitted, I have been contacted by two great schools that liked my job application.
On my drive home today, I was thinking about how I could probably think of a time when any given person I know has doubted themselves in some way. I am really bad at keeping in touch with people, so if I know this about them, my guess it that it was not a one-time deal. I decided, though, that feeling inadequate or doubting yourself is a result of caring. Seems ironic that if you care about something and are a good person you would worry about your performance on anything from your job to your home life to your relationships instead of trusting you are doing what you can.
4 comments:
LOL... I'm sure you're great. It's when you stop worrying about how well you are doing that there's a problem. :-)
Doubt is a motivating force and is one of the banes of being the kind of person who wants to get an "A" on everything. So many things in life aren't graded, so how do we figure out if we've earned that A? This brings up a lot of feelings of doubt, I find.
Trust in the opinions of those who know you and have seen your body of work (like your advisor, who obviously thinks you are doing great!). Trust in yourself. You can do it; and you can do it well!
Ron, very true.
Danielle, doubt can also get in the way. I should start having people grade me so I have a benchmark! ;-)
It's amazing huh, that feeling that if someone thinks you are great... that you are somehow fooling them. I felt that way about teaching when I first started.
I have always thought you would be an amazing teacher and I cannot wait to hear how your interviews go!
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